Being the daughter of a death row inmate or having a family member on death row is challenging in so many ways. It divides the entire family. Most friends disappear. When you move to a new city and or state it is not a subject you share. Most families of death row inmates suffer in silence for decades. In most cases the public treats you like you are guilty of the crime. There is no counseling or state assistance. You are not considered a victim and you are not entitled to help. When you seek counseling you find out that this subject has never been studied or researched. There are no support groups. There are no books or research on the internet in how to cope with your father being a murderer and on death row. As far as the legal complexities, you are on your own there as well. There isn't any state assistance in helping you figure out what happens next. As far as the system is concerned you are treated as if you committed the crime. Back when I went to my father's trial, I was guarded and not allowed in the court room at times. People would not even speak to me. I was only 15.
When there is a scheduled execution the public writes you, in some cases, camps out at your house and the prison and tells you they hate you and want your father/family member to be killed. (This also happens during the arrest pre-trial phase, and during the trial) Every scheduled execution takes a physical & mental toll on your entire body. It is so intense, there are no words to describe it. You make funeral arrangements, say goodbye and grieve like any other person. This is all "prior" to their scheduled death. This can and will go on for years. It has gone on for several decades with my personal situation. You know the exact date and time your father or family member will be killed. Then it might not happen. Several of the scheduled executions he came within hours of being executed. My father has been scheduled for execution 4 times. The State of Alabama on April 15, 2011 filed a motion to set a new execution date.
In order to prepare for a scheduled execution I ramp up my exercise regime to what I call "extreme training." It is the only way I can personally handle the extreme mental and physical stress that comes with a scheduled execution. I am there at the prison sitting with my father going through the process with him. The prison allow the family members several days of visitation right up to a few hours of the actual execution. The death row inmate has been moved to a death watch cell. All of their personal belongings are signed over to you to take with you. It fits in a shopping buggy. I watched it wheeled out a few times. Being with my father prior to his execution is a situation that is indescribable. To do it multiple times is another level of intensity that is beyond words. I am not sure how my father prepares for the scheduled execution. We have never spoken about that. Every time I have been there prior to a scheduled execution, he has been calm and we talk about good things. No tears are shed and no regrets about our past differences. For me personally I have been able to access a inner strength deep in my soul that I discovered along time ago. Truly is there any way to prepare for your own execution? Is there any way a daughter or any family member can prepare to watch her father or their family member be executed? Think about it. I don't think you'll find much research on that subject.
I am not so sure this brings the victims any sense of closure. Killing the person responsible for their loved ones death does not bring their loved one back. The victim's family members have to go through every scheduled execution as well. They usually come to a hotel close to the prison, the same hotel as the death row inmates family. Or at least in Alabama, that is the way it is due to town being so small. They go through the same mental and physical stress that I am going through. This is not closure for anyone involved in this process. This is what I would call cruel and unusual punishment. For all the family members to go through decades of scheduled executions is way past closure or anything close to it. That is my personal opinion. I would love the opportunity to speak with the family members of the victim. I think that might give all of us a little closure, more than meeting up at the execution on opposite sides of the death chamber.
Most people assume you should just hate the death row inmate and turn off all the feelings. It does not work that way. No matter how horrible this person is or was, you cannot just turn everything off. Even if you want to and try to. I wish it had been that easy...
I think it is safe to assume most death row inmates were not and are not nice people. My father was a violent alcoholic who verbally and physically abused me and my brother and both my stepmothers. The first stepmother was lucky to get out alive. He killed the second stepmothers sister and almost killed her cousin. I loved her and never saw her or my half brother or step brother again after that. I loved my first stepmother as well, but only saw her once after she left. My own biological mother will not even speak to me and pretends I do not exist. I am still trying to figure that one out. Most people feared him. He was released from prison for the murder of my 2nd stepmothers sister, and while on work release was arrested for the murder is now on death row for.
I did hate my father for most of my life. I blamed him for everything that went wrong in my life. There came a point where I needed to forgive him so that I could close this chapter of my life. I also needed to move forward in life and clear all the "blockage" this hate was causing me. I also wanted to know more about the murder of Troy Wicker. This mission I call it, turned into something I never expected. I found more questions than answers with this murder. I did finally give myself the gift of forgiveness with my father. However, this chapter is not closed yet. I am still working on that....
I am not 100% certain my father murdered Troy Wicker. Personally, I do not think he should have ever been released from prison for the murder of my stepmothers sister, Eloise West & the attempted murder of her cousin Charlotte Harbin. However, I do not think we should execute anyone if there is a chance they are innocent. This may be hard for people to understand. How can I say all this and then say we should not execute him? We should not execute "anyone" if there are questions as strong as there are in this case and many other death row cases.
Because I have stood up for my beliefs in my father's case, people assume they know me and what I am trying to accomplish. I must confess most of what I have done was for me and for my "mission" to close this chapter of my life. I did not do it to prove my father was innocent. It was all for me. It turned into so much more that is much larger than myself....
I discovered so many problems with our Capital Punishment Judicial System. I felt I had to speak up. I am not 100% certain my father committed this murder. I feel we have executed innocent people and we will execute more innocent people. This system is so flawed and it could happen to anyone.
I always thought there was hard evidence when a person gets the death penalty. I had no idea that the possibility of executing innocent people was even possible. I got a rude awakening to the judicial system. The United Nations found the state of Alabama most likely has executed innocent people and found their legal system seriously flawed. The American Bar Association found this as well. If you don't believe me, listen to people who are highly experienced to make these comments and back it up with actual facts. Read U.N ReportRead ABA Report
This problem is not limited to Alabama....
With all this being said, being the daughter of a death row inmate is just that. I am his daughter and he is my father. I love him and I forgive him. That is a gift I allowed myself to recieve.
Don't be so quick to judge someone who has a family member on death row or serving life without parole. We have alot of the same emotions and feeling that all families face. We also face issues that have never been researched or studied and we are just trying to figure it out and find our way through life....
My father has been scheduled for execution 4 times. April 15, 2011 the State of Alabama filed a motion to set another execution date. Some of the crime scene DNA was tested in 2009. Test results were negative for my father. Additional physical evidence has been "lost" by the state. Existing physical evidence that has never been DNA tested will never be tested because you do not have a right to prove your innocence. The United States Supreme Court made that ruling a few years ago... Evidence that was DNA tested in my fathers case came back negative, but since it was not tested to "prove his innocence" and was tested "to see if another mans confession was the truth", those negative DNA tests are not relevant to my fathers claims of innocence or his case.....Yes, you read that correctly... The State of Alabama will more than likely execute my father this year. As far as I am aware it will the first time a person has been executed after DNA tests came back negative for them and without ever having their first Habeas Corpus Review.. If you do not understand that, you should and you should be very concerned.
Sherrie Stone
Note: June 22nd the Supreme Court of Alabama denied the State's motion to set a new execution date as it was "prematurely" filed. What that means is the defense will be allowed to file some additional motions and it will be few more months before the State can file another motion to set a new execution date...... I am certain the State will push for this year.